It's been a rough couple of weeks for running. I'm less motivated than usual, I'm feeling exhausted, and it's been busy at work and in other parts of life. I can't help but think - why did I sign up for another marathon? What am I doing? Do I really want to run 15 miles this weekend and to keep adding distance after that?
Today's run was no exception to this mental lapse and it was hard to even get out the door. I changed into running clothes, went outside, and hit the button to get satellites on my Garmin. It locked quickly so I didn't even stretch before my run (I usually do a little) because I feared I wouldn't want to go anywhere if I waited longer.
This lack of motivation is rather unusual for me and frustrating. I feel like it should be mental so I can just wipe it away, but that isn't working so far. The only thing I can do is force myself out the door and try to stay positive. I started to run and the first mile was really, really tough. I stopped to stretch for a bit and even took a walk break in an attempt to get my mind and body on the same page.
When I feel this way, I go through a little checklist in my head to make myself aware that there is no good reason to stop running. Today went a little something like this.
Am I in pain? No.
Am I injured? No.
Am I out of breath? No.
Is my heart rate too high? No.
Am I sick? No.
Am I tired? Well yeah, but who isn't.
Is anything at all wrong? No.
So there you have it self, there is no reason to stop running today. That said, by the second mile I considered capping my planned 7 mile run at 4 or 5 miles. Knowing my feel-good-and-warmed-up-place is usually 2.5 to 3 miles, I set my goal to run at least that far before turning around for my out and back. I finally felt better (still not good) around 2.5 and held out until 3 miles before turning around. Somewhere after that I found my zone, albeit a slow and tough one, and added the extra mile to finish my planned distance.
By the end of the run I actually felt good and finished strong, but this run took a lot more mental energy than usual. I'm still not sure why I have the lack of motivation or why I feel so exhausted, but if nothing else I boosted my self-esteem a little by finishing my run! I'm so glad I did.
I know this isn't an overall happy and positive post, but the message is something I want to share and need to remember myself. I can do this, I can run, even when it feels tough. Some days are harder than others, yet the end result is always worthwhile.
The next time I run into a mental block, I need to remember how I pushed through it this time and that I really can do it. Believe in the run.
Popular posts from this blog
By Paulette – May 26, 2013As you may remember, I've been doing my best to follow the Hanson half marathon plan for the last couple of months with a race goal of the SF Half Marathon . The Hanson plans focus on building cumulative fatigue, and let me say right now I'm finding out how that works. My legs and body really feel it with every run at this point, and dare I say I haven't even run the plan to its fullest. There are quite a few things I love about the Hanson plans and also a few parts that have been very challenging for me. What I love. Training paces: The book outlines training paces based on your goal times. Although I initially thought they sounded too slow, I'm learning that keeping these paces isn't always as easy as it sounds once the legs are super tired. The paces start to make sense. Hard days versus easy days: They focus on hard effort days followed by easy effort days, meaning the hard days are really hard and the easy are really easy. I love this. I feel like I have
By Paulette – January 20, 2012This post is dedicated to a few friends who have recently started running or will be soon - they know who they are. And they ROCK! Running has done so much for my life, and I want people to know why I love it and to encourage others to stick with running too. The story of how I started is in the 'Why I Run' tab of this blog, but for this post I'm focused why I keep running. Here it is, not necessarily in order of importance. 1. Running relieves stress. When I feel anxious or have had a rough day, running always helps. I often can't wait until it's time to run that day, and sometimes I sneak out at lunch instead of waiting until after work. It makes me feel amazingly focused and happy for the rest of the day. I don't even run with music - I enjoy listening to my footsteps and freeing my mind in the great outdoors. 2. Running makes me happy. The runner's high is real, and I'm addicted. I love nothing more than feeling the exhausted-happiness I get af
By Paulette – February 25, 2013On Saturday, I ran the Lake Chabot Trail Half Marathon in Castro Valley, CA. It was my first Inside Trail Racing event, and I was very impressed with the race organization. I've been trail running for a few months now, but this is only my third trail race event; I love how much more laid back the races are and how everyone seems really into it. I know I am! Exploring new trails and parks is a fantastic way to spend a day. I didn't go into this race with specific goals, I wanted to run the hills as much as I could and use it as a hard training run. I ended up feeling really good, the weather was cool but sunny, and the lake views were pretty. This half didn't have as much elevation gain as many trail races and parts were on paved bike trail, so it was definitely easier than the other trail races I've done. The drive was only about 40 minutes from San Jose and I was there in plenty of time to get parking, pick up my race bib, and to chat with friends. I knew quite a f